Good Friends Are Hard to Find

“When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”

― Maya Angelou 

If anyone knows about gaining and losing friends its me. I have lost so many friends over the years but I’m not upset by that at all because this only the beginning and I will continue to lose friends but I will continue to gain amazing people along the way. Healthy friendships are the basis of who we ware. When we’re little kids in elementary school we still befriend people we don’t really like so we start to trick ourselves into thinking it’s okay to be like that when we’re older.  In middle school I went through so many friend struggles and it was so hard for me at the time. Starting in 5th grade I barely had friends at school I had maybe one or two consistently throughout the year. Girls didn’t really care for me and neither did guys but I understand why. Throughout middle school while I was losing friends rapidly it was always because I was never being myself.

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I tried to hard to be someone who I wasn’t  and people can see through that. If you’re struggling with keeping a good set of people around you first look and see if it’s you because it just might be.

For girls especially we see so much media on “best friends” and what friendship should be but these friendships aren’t always the healthiest or the most positive. I idolized Penny and Dijonay’s friendship from The Proud Family not realizing that they were actually terrible friends to each other they just knew each other for a long time.

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“True friendship doesn’t have a time period some of your worst friends are the one you’ve known the longest. Some of the best ones have just entered your life.”

My grandmother and her best friend showed me that your friend will be there for you at the drop of a dime. They’ve been best friends forever and they have had each other’s back through everything. The don’t live close to each other and they don’t see each other  everyday.  I used to think someone wasn’t my friend if I didn’t talk to them often or see them everyday. They would drive for each other and I admire that the most. 

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My grandmother ,Sheila, on the left and my aunt Peggy ,her best friend, on the right for my grandmother’s wedding.

Three of my close friends in high school we all call them the “trio” Lexus, Quinell, and Maiya are the depiction of a strong and healthy friendship. They love each other to no end and they are there for each other at 11 am and 11 pm. The three of them show me that friendship doesn’t stop in the mist of pursing your dreams. Having a strong supportive friendship where you aren’t tearing each other down constantly is a beautiful thing and my girls I’m so glad you guys have been amazing to friends to me and each other for close to a decade keep grinding and keep shining pretty girls!

My mom always surrounded herself with women who were about their business and her close friends were no exception. Throughout my life my mom kept three women close to her that was Ms. Kwann, Ms. Dion, and my Tee Angie. They had each other point-blank no explanation. They are here for my mom and my brother and I. My mom is there for them and there kids.

I met my best friend in the 8th grade but I had no clue that she would be my best friend or that we would be close in any way. She is strong-minded ,independent, fabulous, and intelligent. There is nothing that she wouldn’t do for me. This chick has got my back and that’s all that matters. We always joke that we are the “Frankensquad” the outsiders of our own squad and it’s true but no matter who we’re close with at the end of the day that’s my girl.

My friends are some of the best people who I have met thus far. I am so unbelievably grateful for all of you. Friendship is about growing and building together and each of my friends taught me that you need a support system who can look at you from the outside. Your friends will accept you for who you are. It takes time and a couple of trial and errors but good friends will come. Some days will feel like the end of the world when you don’t have friends but it’s not. They aren’t your friends that’s the bottom of the line when someone is supposed to be in your life they will be friendship test boundaries and personalities . Stop saying what you want your friends to be because your friends will be who they are just like you will be who you are.

Thank you to my amazing friends!

 

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel”

-Maya Angelou